The Ending Was Always This One
by Severuslovesme
Summary: Cooper stares out the peephole for what seems like an hour. Violet is here. Violet is here. He should have known, when he heard the knock. She’s the only person that ever comes over this late.


He's just turned off SportsCenter when he hears the knock on the door.

Cooper stares out the peephole for what seems like an hour. Violet is here. _Violet _is here. He should have known, when he heard the knock. She's the only person that ever comes over this late. She's also the last person he wants to talk to right now, except for maybe Alan.

He closes his eyes and sees Alan's arm slide across Violet's waist; comfortable, proprietary; and grits his teeth.

Opening the door, he mentally braces himself.

When she asks why he didn't check on her, the hurt so evident on her face, he doesn't have an answer. He didn't check on her because he can't keep doing this to himself – hoping that this time she'll get over Alan for real; this time she'll wake up and realize that he loves her. He can't watch her heart break again and again, because it breaks him a little bit, too.

Violet's in her sweats, and she doesn't know it, but they drive him crazy. Hair pulled back, no makeup and sweat pants, and she's still the most beautiful woman he knows.

She walks in when he opens the door wider, tension evident in the line of her neck.

Cooper wants to run away, to just not deal with this _for once, _but he follows her, resigned.

Violet doesn't come over very often; her house is much nicer than his, so they spend most of their time there. It's a little weird to have her here, especially since they've never done the post-Alan ritual here. But he suspects that this one might be a little different, regardless of location.

She walks into his living room and stops, looking at him helplessly. He holds out his arms – what else can he do, really? She wraps her arms around him and lays her head on his chest.

"I don't want to grow," she mumbles into his shirt. He pats her hair and doesn't speak. They stand that way for a while, and he can feel her heartbeat and the warmth of her skin through both of their shirts.

Deciding this is likely to take a while, he maneuvers them to the couch, arms still around each other.

They sit down, and she's leaning up against him, practically sitting in his lap. He thinks it will probably make this easier if they don't have to look at each other.

She is a warm weight partially on top of him, and he absently brushes a piece of hair out of her face.

"I talked to Sam." He doesn't say anything, can't admit to her that he saw her crying and walked away.

"He was nice about it," she continues. "Really nice. But I'd rather have had Roscoe's and Ashley Judd." She pauses.

"And you." Her voice hitches a little, and he wonders if she's crying again.

"You have me. I'll always be here." He means it, more than he's ever meant anything.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry. I'm sorry that Alan's a jerk."

She huffs a laugh at that. "I'm sorry you always pick up my pieces. I should say thank you more often."

He smiles. "It's ok."

"It seems like it's not." She twists around to look at him, but there's no accusation in her words.

"I just, I can't keep watching you make yourself less than you are for him. He's not worth it." He reaches his hand up to run it through his hair but Violet interrupts the movement, taking his hand.

He gives her hand a squeeze and releases it, but she holds on, threading their fingers together and dropping them to her lap.

"I get defensive cause I know you're right." She sounds sincere. He drops a kiss on her hair.

"I know I'm right, too." She elbows him, but not very hard.

"It's Alan or you, Coop, and I choose you. Also, I wish I hadn't forgotten the Ashley Judd movies at home." He knows she means she chooses his friendship, but his heart starts beating a little faster.

"You don't have to choose. I mean, you should forget Alan anyway, because he sucks, but you know you don't have to choose."

"I know. But I want to choose. I don't want to do this with Alan anymore. And Cooper, I would choose you over anyone. You're my best friend." She whispers that last part, so quietly he almost misses it.

Cooper sighs. He just, he loves her. How could he not? She's sitting there, essentially in his lap, warm and soft and telling him that she'd choose him over anyone else. He thinks that if he had a best friend other than Violet, they would tell him that he has to move past her, that it's making him miserable. Irony was lame.

Trying to lighten the mood a little, he asks, "What about Bill? Would you choose me over Bill?"

She laughs but doesn't say anything, and cuddles closer.

They talk for a long time; Cooper repeats that Alan's an idiot, and he tells her about what happened with Maya and Ruby. Violet recounts the conversation she had with her sister last night, tells him proudly that her niece is learning to walk. Then they sit in silence for a while, just enjoying each other's company.

Cooper wakes up the next morning to the sound of a phone ringing and Violet's hair tickling his nose. He takes a minute just to breathe and hold her, until he realizes that she's stirring on top of him, and his morning erection is making its presence known, and oh, the phone's still ringing.

He tries to extricate himself gently, but Violet murmurs a sleepy, "What," and is clinging to him like a warm barnacle. Stretching, he manages to answer the phone.

"Hello?"

"Cooper."

"Hey Naomi, what's up?" Violet rolls a little bit, so he can stand up.

"Just wondered if you were planning on coming to work today?" Cooper squints at the clock. 10:30. Shit.

"Yeah, yeah, sorry, overslept, we'll be there soon."

"_We'// _be here soon? I take it you've found Violet, then. We wondered where she was."

Cooper feels the blush rising up.

"Uh, she's here, I'll explain later, we'll see you soon."

"Later. Ok." Cooper can _hear _her raised eyebrow. Shit.

He hangs up and looks at Violet, who is still lying on the sofa, though one eye is cracked open.

"Morning," he ventures. Her response is half mumble, half groan. Cooper smiles. He'd forgotten that she was definitely not a morning person.

"What-im zit?" She yawns, making her words even harder to decipher. Thankfully Cooper has what amounts to an advanced doctorate in "Violet-speak."

"10:30. We … are not exactly on time for work. Which is who was on the phone."

She grimaces, and closes the open eye.

"No work. More sleep."

"I wish we could, sleepy, but Naomi was kind of insistent that we actually do our jobs."

She opens one eye again. "Breakfast?"

"We can have breakfast. Even though it's almost lunch time." She opens the other eye.

"Ok." She uncurls a little and stretches, reminding him of nothing more than a housecat reluctant to leave its nest. He thinks her bed head is adorable, and yeah, he's got it bad.

"Sorry for passing out on you." She yawns again.

"Quite all right, I like being a human pillow. It makes me feel manly."

He smiles. She's looking at him kind of funny though, so he falls back on an old standby: jokes.

"Last one to the bathroom has to make breakfast!"

"As if I would eat anything you cooked." He pauses.

"Hey! I make a mean pancake, I'll have you know." Violet, obviously a little more awake now, takes advantage of his distraction to dash for the bathroom.

"Prove it!" She calls over her shoulder.

He chases her. It's what he does.

Violet insisted on going home to change, which made sense, he conceded, because of the sweats, so he walks into the office alone.

Dell looks up as he walks through the lobby.

"Where's Violet?"

"She needed clothe- what did Naomi tell everyone? Nothing happened. We just fell asleep talking." Dell is nodding and smiling, obviously not buying it.

Cooper runs a hand through his hair.

Sam comes out of his office, patient file in hand.

"Hey Coop. Where's Violet?" He sighs. Naomi could not keep a secret. Sam and Dell grin.

"Ok, I'm just gonna…go to my office."

He waves at Violet from his desk when he sees her come in. She waves back, and then he watches as Addison and Naomi practically frog march her to the break room. He can't hear them, of course, but the talk looks pretty serious. Violet has her arms crossed in front of her chest.

Cooper shakes his head and goes back to work. A little later, after he diagnoses a seven-year-old boy with strep throat and does a standard exam on a newborn, he swings by Violet's office to make sure Addison and Naomi haven't been giving her a hard time.

She's with a patient though, so he just smiles at her through the glass and goes in search of coffee.

Naomi's in the break room, and when he greets her she gives him a look.

"What?"

A raised eyebrow is the only response he gets.

"Thanks for telling everyone, by the way. You're supposed to use your powers for good, you know, like telling me who Violet fantasizes about, not for evil." He opens the cabinet and rummages around, looking for the plain coffee.

"I didn't tell _everyone._ I told Addison. And Addison told Pete and Sam, and one of them must have told Dell…"

"Naomi."

"What do you care? According to Violet it was just a friendly little impromptu sleepover."

"It was. That's all it was. She was upset about Alan; I comforted her, as is my assigned job, and that was all. Which is why it really isn't gossip fodder."

"C'mon, we're a big, happy family! We tell each other things. Even things that aren't really our business."

"Ok, but family needs to be supportive and not freak out at Violet when we have an impromptu friendly sleepover. Like siblings." He blanches.

"Or…not like siblings. At all. But still." He tries to glare. Naomi laughs and stirs her coffee.

"There wasn't any freaking out." It's his turn to give her a look.

"There was a little freaking out," she concedes. "We were surprised! It was surprising. I thought she was over Alan? She said she had Bill now."

"Well, Alan turned up, which he has a tendency to do, and fucked with her mind."

"Ah. And you comforted her, because that's what you do."

"It is. I'm a very comforting person."

"With Violet. And five-year-olds, I guess. But mostly Violet."

"Hey!"

"What, Coop? It's pretty obvious that you're on cleanup detail on a weekly basis."

"I…don't mind. It's Violet."

"I'm just saying, and I love Violet, but you're a person, too. You don't just exist to take care of Violet."

"I know that." He's feeling defensive now, but he's not sure why. He busies himself with the coffee machine.

"Just, be careful." When he looks up to ask what she means by that, Naomi is gone.

Cooper makes his coffee, picks at the pasta salad in the fridge, and goes back to his office. He spends an hour organizing case files so he doesn't have to think about Violet.

"Hey." He looks up and Violet is standing in the doorway. So much for not thinking about her.

"What's up?"

She walks a little farther into the room.

"I was hoping I could refer a patient of mine to you. His parents brought him in because they think he's depressed, but I want to make sure it's not a thyroid problem or something else physical."

"Sure, just have Dell give me the file." She nods.

"I also wanted to say thank you for last night."

"Vi, really, it's cool. I'm glad you came over." She smiles at him.

"Me too."

She flops down on his couch and picks up one of the picture books he keeps there to entertain patients.

"The Berenstain Bears?" What is this, the '70s?"

"What, it's a classic!"

Violet laughs. "I was always a fan of Mrs. Piggle Wiggle, myself."

"Ok, now who's stuck in the dark ages?"

She laughs, but then goes quiet.

"Alan?" He guesses.

"He thought that children's books were patronizing." She puts the book back on the coffee table.

"You know, I thought I'd run out of reasons to hate Alan, but thank you, you've given me another one." Violet smiles, but it doesn't reach her eyes. "Yup, I've got a list, and this is definitely going on it. Seriously, Vi … Alan's not the guy for you. He's just not." I am I am I am, his brain is chanting.

"I know. I know. He sucks. But at least this time, I got to walk away. And you know what? I don't want to ever talk about Alan again."

"Aww, you're growing."

"Shut up, I mean it."

"Sounds like a good plan to me."

This time her smile reaches her eyes.

"Seriously, Cooper, thank you for consoling me about Alan. I appreciate it."

"No thanks necessary, honestly." Violet looks mutinous.

"Do you want to come over for dinner tonight? It won't be pancakes, but I can probably find something to cook." His brain is screaming that it's a bad idea to spend more time with Violet right now, when he already can't get her out of his head. But he knows it's her way of saying sorry and thank you, plus he's weak.

"Promise it won't be rotting?" He grins at her affronted look.

"Hey, pancake-boy, I'll have you know that I am a perfectly decent cook. I just…don't do it very often. But I can."

"I'll believe it when I see it."She gives him the finger and a smile, and leaves.

Later that afternoon there's a staff meeting, which feels like it lasts a thousand years but probably is closer to an hour. Cooper spends it passing notes with Violet, until a comment mocking Addison's upcoming gynecological conference earns him a glare, an elbow in the gut, and a complete freeze out.

She obviously forgives him, though, because after the meeting she tells him to just come over whenever he wants after work.

He thinks about her until the fortuitous arrival of a patient means he can think about something else.

He's on his way to Exam room One when Pete calls his name from across the lobby. He walks to meet him, noticing that Violet's office is empty now.

"Hey man, want to get a beer after work?"

"I can't, sorry, I'm having dinner at Violet's. Maybe tomorrow?"

Pete raises his eyebrows and Cooper really wishes people would stop doing that.

"Dinner, huh?" Cooper rolls his eyes.

"Dinner. I'll make sure to tell you all the thrilling details tomorrow, and maybe you can tell me why Addison was crying in her office earlier."

Pete looks guilty. "I didn't do anything!"

Cooper just smiles and goes on his way.

He gets to Violet's house a little before seven, after showering and changing clothes. Hey, he's a guy; he lives in hope. The sun is setting behind him as she opens the door, and the fading light makes her glow.

She's not wearing sweats tonight, but jeans and a tight t-shirt is a pretty close second, in his opinion.

They chatter about work, and whether the wine he brought will be any good, and how the chicken picatta that she's making is ambitious and thus likely to be a disaster. It strikes him, as she hands him a paring knife and tells him to work for his supper, how comfortable this is. Coming home from work, cooking dinner together, laughing over their days – it's pretty much his domestic fantasy come to life. Except that they're not together. There's that tiny detail.

He slices a lemon and tries not to imagine how he could kiss away the smudge of flour on her cheek if they were together, and then kiss her mouth, and then make love to her on the kitchen floor while dinner burned.

"Done with those?" Her question startles him out of his daydream and his hand shakes as he hands her the lemon slices, almost dropping them.

She adds them to the pan while he pours the wine. They watch the pan simmer and spit for a minute, drinking their wine in companionable silence.

When dinner's ready they sit at her kitchen table, because she never uses the dining room, and drink their wine and eat the surprisingly good chicken. She blushes when he compliments her on it, and he makes a mental note to ask her to cook more often. They talk about the Laker's chances this season, and the new exhibit at the Museum of Contemporary Art, and don't mention Alan or work at all.

They're cleaning up; he's washing dishes and she's drying; and he finally uses his thumb to swipe the flour from her cheek, giving her a half grin as he does.

She scrubs the counters while he teases her about being little Suzy Homemaker, and she threatens him with salmonella when she's not laughing.

Kitchen clean, they take their wine to the living room, sitting on the couch in a close approximation of last night's cuddling. Something about last night, Cooper thinks, makes sitting so close to Violet feel easier, more natural. Not that they haven't always been touchy-feely, but for whatever reason it feels more comfortable now. He slings an arm around her and clinks his glass against hers.

"To friends," he says.

"Friends," she repeats.

She sighs, and he tightens his arm around her shoulders.

"Naomi thinks I take advantage of you," she begins, conversationally, taking a sip of her wine.

"Naomi should mind her own business."

"I don't mean to take advantage of you. And I don't want to."

"Hey, I know that. You don't."

"Would you tell me if I did?"

"Mmm, probably not."

"Cooper! I'm being serious."

He puts his glass down on the table. "Ok, ok. If you can't talk about your problems with your friends, then who can you talk about them with? The next time some girl from the Internet steals something from me, I'll call you, and then we can be even. Deal?"

"Deal." She leans into him.

He wishes she would stop snuggling closer, not that he doesn't like it, but much closer and she's going to realize that he doesn't just like her as a friend.

"I really appreciate you always being there, Coop. I hope you know that."

"I know."

He moves to kiss her forehead, but she's raising her head, and instead of connecting with her forehead, his lips hit hers. He pulls back in a panic, but she grabs his shirt and pulls him back to her. He kisses her for real this time, like he means it, even though his brain is quietly freaking out.

The weird thing is, she's kissing him back. As in, Violet is kissing him. His hand is in her hair, her curls twining around his fingers, and her hand is on his thigh, and there's no slapping or crying or any of the horrible outcomes he imagined when he imagined this. It's sort of a … miracle, his mind supplies.

The only way to describe this is as a miracle.

He pulls back after a minute, because oxygen is good. "Um…" he starts.

"What just happened?" Violet looks a little shell-shocked but she's not screaming or running away, so he'll take that as a good sign.

"I kissed you?"

"That's what I thought." She pauses.

"Ok." She reaches for him but he moves back.

"Ok? What? I kissed you! Don't we need to talk or something?"

"Not really. Unless you want to."

"Um, ok."

"Ok." And then she kisses him again.

This time he wakes up when the alarm rings, and in a bed, which is good because he's getting old. But there's a Violet-shaped lump next to him and a hand holding his, and when he pokes her through the comforter she makes a growling sound that both frightens and turns him on.

He coaxes her out from under the covers with promises of pancakes and kisses on her forehead, nose and neck. Then she's kissing him back and yeah, Naomi's going to be pissed because they are definitely going to be late for work.


End file.
